"Heres your sign!"

spdjnky_42 · 01-31-2009

This place is gettin kinda... well anyways just thought Id add a little HUMOR!

Ill start it off "Heres your sign" :

Last time I had a flat tire, I pulled my truck into one of
those side-of-the-road gas stations. The attendant walks
out, looks at my truck, looks at me, and I SWEAR he said,
"Tire go flat?" I couldn't resist. said, "Nope. I was
driving around and those other three just swelled right up on
me. Here's your sign."

**RLG34750** · 01-31-2009

True story......

i was standing in the driveway and the wife brought out our miniature daschund out and a lady walking by inquired about the breed ,the lady ask how big he was going to get.....

and i jump in and said 80-100 lbs......

the key here is miniature......

she paused for a moment and said he going to be a big one....

Here's your sign......

05horse · 01-31-2009

i was at work, cutting steel with a oxy torch pantograph, i jsut got the torch rollin and stepped back, and this curious contracter said, are you really cutting 9 inch thick steel? ( with blantant cuts laying all over the table )

nope....

haha look and deside for urself what im doing

my hammer barely hides the flame on my torch though

as for the tongs, thats them fully collapsed..they get twice that size

Free5oh · 01-31-2009

The name of my company is DFW Camper Corral-The Truck Accessory Store, and i have had several people ask if we sell Truck Accessories.
Really.......????? Its just in our company name we actually sell carpentry supplies jackmite. some people, i just wonder sometimes

battlr · 01-31-2009

Let me start off saying I'm white and sound white with no accent at all. "race doesn't matter, but everytime I remember this it makes me laugh"

When I was in highschool I worked for a rental car company. One day I answered the phone, and on the other end was a lady with a very thick accent that said, " Excuse me, but do you speak vietnamese." It took everything I had to not say, "I'm sorry but do I sound like I speak vietnamese."

disclaimer: this post is for a good laugh. Race is nothing more then checking a box on a piece of paper. My wife happens to be japanese and italian. (aloing with my kids)

**RLG34750** · 01-31-2009

avoid the disclaimer next time just say i'm American.....

just for the record i didn't mean anything either.....

this political correct stuff really

sometimes

only thing i see when i'm in here are Mustang owners.....

**EagleAutosports** · 01-31-2009

Politically correct??? Leave that at the door as far as I'm concerned... we all need some humor and that's all this is. And there's nothing wrong with that.

Free5oh · 01-31-2009

+2, PC, is super lame sometimes... well most of the time

95blkcobra · 01-31-2009

im not very Politically correct ever and here in california everybody is always telling me i mean or i shouldnt say that blah blah blah but i call it how i see it! i mean if i know its going to hurt your feeling ill try to avoid it but i cant stand ppl who let EVERTHING hurt their feeling, i dont have time for babies and if you dont like it them go crawl back into mommys womb! sorry had to get that off my chest.

**RLG34750** · 01-31-2009

Quote:

Originally Posted by Free5oh

+2, PC, is super lame sometimes... well most of the time

Quote:

Originally Posted by 95blkcobra

im not very Politically correct ever and here in california everybody is always telling me i mean or i shouldnt say that blah blah blah but i call it how i see it! i mean if i know its going to hurt your feeling ill try to avoid it but i cant stand ppl who let EVERTHING hurt their feeling, i dont have time for babies and if you dont like it them go crawl back into mommys womb! sorry had to get that off my chest.

.....hey guys this is suppose to a fun thread......

Talking about stupid people, I was behind a lady in a grocery store at the checkout counter. The cashier scanned her items and bagged them as the lady wrote out a check. She hemmed and hawwed a bit trying to recall the correct date to write on her check, or so I thought.
She then clearly and in all seriousness asked the cashier "how do you spell IGA?"

Here's your sign....

95blkcobra · 01-31-2009

well i have a cousin who can be a huge airhead sometimes. this was a few years ago(freshman yr in high school) we were at my grandmas house helping her out and we got thirsty so i sent him to get me some ice water, a few seconds later i hear him calling my name i go in the kitchen and he looks at me with two cups of water and asks "where grandma keep her ice..." i couldnt believe he asked that so i told him she keeps it in the attic lol and he looks at me and goes "no way, why would she keep it up there?" lol blondes lol

that same cousin last year was working with me and my dad and we started talking about what language was spoken in china, he swaers its chinese lol there is no chinese language its manderian and i tried to explain that to him. he walks away. about 2 min later i go into the shop to take a break and hes on the phone, i asked who u calling? he says "im calling 411(info)" i asked why u calling them? he tells me "to see what language they speak in china" i fell out of my seat laughing. gotta love family

**EagleAutosports** · 01-31-2009

He calls information to find out what language it is in China???

**RLG34750** · 01-31-2009

now thats funny stuff right ......

95blkcobra · 01-31-2009

yeah i couldnt believe it, i tried to tell him that its for phone numbers and stuff but he insisted lol

battlr · 01-31-2009

Last year we responded to a vehicle accident. After the call we were B.S.ing with the highway patrol officer. An engineer I work with was asking about the taser he had. He insisted it probably couldn't "hurt that bad".

Keep in mind this is a non lethal tool that is supposed to DROP most men and incapasitate them to be subdued. How, I have no idea, but he convinced the officer to tase him through his jacket. Prongs not released just a jolt. Needless to say it must have hurt like hell, because it just about dropped him and he screamed like girl. I bet he'd never do that again. "here's your sign"