 European Security Levels Raised - JOKE
European Security Levels Raised
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The British are feeling the pinch in relation to
recent terrorist bombings and therefore have raised
their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved'.
Soon though, security levels may be raised yet again
to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross". Londoners
have not been "A Bit Cross" since the Blitz in 1940 -
when tea supplies all but ran out.
Terrorists have been officially re-categorised from
"Tiresome" to a "Bloody Nuisance". The last time the
British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was
during the Great Fire of 1666.
Also, the French government announced yesterday that
it had also raised its terror alert level from "Run"
to "Hide". The only two higher levels in France are
"Surrender" and "Collaborate". The rise was
precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France's
white flag factory, effectively paralysing the
country's military capability.
It's not only the English and French that are on a
heightened level of alert. Italy has increased the
alert level from "shout loudly and excitedly" to
"elaborate military posturing". Two more levels
remain, "ineffective combat operations" and "change
sides".
The Germans, wishing to stay in lock-step with their
neighbours, have also increased their alert state from
"disdainful arrogance" to "dress in uniform and sing
marching songs". They have two higher alert levels:
"invade a neighbour" and "lose".
The world should now feel a safer place...
__________________ I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal labotomy.
I have to start acting sensibly .............................................. Tomorrow ! | 
